Day 194

Let me tell you about today, December 16, 2011


Today I explained to one of my good friends Mark C. about my rating system for girls.

Now, Let me tell you what this is not, it's not a sleazy hot girl scale. It's a great system for combining friends, possibly finding a girl friend, a future roommate, or just passing the time in the mall by rating people. first let me explain how this rating came to be. I needed a way to categorize my friends, and possible girl friends into separate times of hanging out so that I wasn't ditching my friends for some girl. So then what I have come up with is a two toned rating system. each person gets a letter either A, B, C, D, and F just like in school. they also get a number starting at one, and going through 10. ten being the high point.

So then let me show you how this works for my friends, I have several best friends, Suzanna, Steven, Mitch, Heather, Zach, and Kelcy. I give each new friend a number relating to how i think their personality is, and a letter on how well i think they will mix with me and the people i hangout with most.  For instance I have my friend Mark C, mark is a 9B. i could always bring him around my friends and there would be no awkwardness no matter what, but i doubt i would walk in and see him hanging in suz's apartment without me inviting him over. then there is the opposite side of the scale. I have a friend named Brittany. she's a great friend but she's like a 3F. My friends don't like her and she's not the kind of girl that keeps the conversation going, just fun to hang out with. so there's how it works when you rate friends. i try to only take people who are 5C's or above and introduce them to my friends and try to induct them.

now that same system can apply for girls that i want to date or be friends with. lets take an old Ex who would never read this because she hates my guts. BUT. At the time, she was rated a 8B here's what she looks like

8B

In this system the number is your level of attractiveness while your Letter is how compatible we are as a boyfriend/girlfriend. Now here are some more examples.

Kate Beckinsale

10F

Yes she is gorgeous but lets' be honest she's just a few years shy of being the same age as my mom. gross.  although the good thing about people who are a 7 through 10. and score low on the lettering scale.. . they make for great make out partners!! 

Sigmund 

1D

she is clearly a monster, although she is hilarious!!! so we have a better chance than kate and i do. Kinda sad now that i think about it.  

So there you have it, the rating system, i encourage you to go out and use it to your benefit, whether it's for matching friends up or for finding a date. anytime it's useful!!

Day 191

Let me tell you about today, December 13, 2011

school

School is going. i feel the pressure to graduate on time, yet i want to stay a student forever and see my friends everyday. the up coming semesters are going to be bitter sweet as i start to see all my friends move away and grow up. this semester was really challenging i bit off more than i could chew, yet i managed to pull out mostly A's. i had a class over contemporary art history, and the times when i went, which was once a week, were so informative i really enjoyed learning about all the past and current artists. i also had my first graphic design class, which was frustrating. we had three different teachers. it made for a real mess when it came to starting a project. needless to say i will be glad when i get my grade for that one. i was well earned. My final bible class was this semester. i copped out and took a course over money, and what the bible has to say about it. it was really informative. but an easy A in the end. I also had my first Illustration class. it was very hard. i found it hard to keep up with the fine artists such as alison treat and alex waldo. made my nights long, but in the end i have learned so much, Keely and I kinda spear headed a gallery opening for the illustration class. turned out great! my final class was a class over the adobe InDesign program. which even though i didn't get the highest grade in there i got a fairly decent profolio turn out. towards the end i found myself working with a lot of passion and learning a lot of new illustrator techniques. but finals are here and i have been done since monday.

friends

OMG i can not even express how great this semester has been with my friends. I have the best room mates in the world. Talon is a tall funny guy and is probably the loudest person you will ever meet. Sean has the best laugh and lets face it no one can shake their junk like him. Oh and mark... let me just say this, "Listen." but i have meet so many great people this semester and grew closer to a lot of my friends that i already had. Robbie and Keely, i can not begin to count the number of hours we have stayed up together and the number of bad accents i have heard from keely. Steven Suzanna, and Mitch always will be my besties!!! no matter what i know they have my best interest at heart and truly want to be there for me. It was nice enough to get to meet and become friends with all the incoming rushies. you guys rock! i grew a lot closer to my upper classmen friends this semester Kayleigh Taryn Melanie you guys are great! i mean it's like where would i be in life without you. Dead. i could go on and on about everylast detail but like i said this is a overview... ish.

family

I want to start of with the most important people in my life, my family. I finally get to see them this week. My flight leaves on saturday. it's been months since i've seen my family it really is just the perfect timing for me to see them. i will be spending the upcoming holiday with them catching up on the past four months and hanging out. My little brother Mak is now 18... it's still a shocker to me, i always pictured him as my little 13-year-old brother. but now he smokes, has a job, and more tattoos than i do. go figure. My mom, bless her heart! i can not wait to see her! call me a mama's boy I DON'T CARE! no one has been there like my mom has. hopefully i can convince her to speak in her southern accent the whole break. that would make my life the best. I will get to see my stepdad clarence this break too! i'm going to give him such a hard time, but at the same time i know my limits he will smack me down quickly. needless to say i am ready to once again have my family, it's hard being on my own. but i'm glad i had such great people in my life to teach me correctly. life isn't nearly as hard as it could be.
over view
It's been a while, but I have finished the semester with great grades and great memories. I've decided to blog my thoughts out, i tend to do that when i have a lot on my mind. I just usually don't post them.

arts

this semester i feel like i broaden my portfolio with a lot of work, did a lot of great work thanks to the helpful cirques from my classmates. i'll just give you an example of what i have been doing in each of my classes and personal side projects.
my photography, i did a couple shoots this semester but i would always like to do more.
this is Sarah U. she had this idea for a Vendetta shoot and it turned out quite sexy!

Next we have a shot of Lawson, he was my little brother in Kappa this rush year, he is a huge mumford and sons fan, so as a gift i did this shoot with him.

Next we have illustration which was a challenge, but i did do what i think is a great piece i used a technique called stippling. which is basically a lot of little dots. It was inspired by the late 70's moive Howard the Duck.

finally we get to InDesign, which is actually just illustrator and photoshop and getting them ready for print. this is an infographic i did over vikings, it turned out great. although this isn't the finished file..

i'm excited to continue to learn more about ART and the practice of it.

work

UGH this semester has been the worst when it comes to a job. i did some free lance work most of it ended on a good foot, one guy said he was going to sue me. never doing that again. I worked as a model, art teacher, telemarketer, food sever, and graphic design intern this semester and still never had a steady pay. how do i survive. GOD. MAGIC. WHO KNOWS!

Day 36

Let me tell you about today, June 5, 2011.

So, i haven't really had enough stuff to write about, until yesterday.
I yesterday i started my job for the summer. I'll be a proctor for the upward bound program and what the program does is give an educational opportunity to low income and first generation high school students. First I moved everything (again) into my college dorm room, and it's on the third floor, which means i had to make ten, count them ten! trips up and down the stairs to get my stuff moved in. but with all that said and done, i called it a night. early the next morning the students moved in. Yuck. they had all kinds of stuff, TV's, microwaves, skateboards, xboxs, and hello kitty toasters. all of which was moved in. but other than that the kids have been super active, they are always checking in and out going to play basketball, or hanging out, it's nice to see students that are separated from the internet and technology for a change.

i've been editing some photos from a recent shoot, which was nice. it's a good brake from the kiddos. here's what i have so far.

This is heather, she's a red head that falls down a lot and turns red when she laughs, AKA not gangster. so i changed her in this shoot!

This is conner, he plays every sport under the sun. poor conner i made him do laps till he broke up a good sweat. then i got several great shots finally getting to use the basic lights i got. classic!

The next few are of a girl named jacklyn, she's cool! her goals in life are to make all of her freckles connect so she can be tan... she's getting close. this one was taken with the sun behind her and I was trying to capture the "Golden Hour" look... worked pretty good.

On our stroll through the field to take these shots, i spotted this red rusted out truck, it was prefect! so i was like "get up there" and she did, great shot!

This last one is my favorite! several hours later i had her come over to my grandma's where we have this old shed. i broke out my lights and had a "high fasion" feel to the shots, really happy with the way they turned out!

other than that i'm just living with these kids. i'll keep you up dated.

Day 14

Let me tell you about today May 13, 2011.

Today was an exciting day for me! I got to shoot some people! With my camera is what I meant. I woke up early thinking I would start shooting around 10. That was a bad Idea..ish.. I felt great getting up I mean I had energy and stuff. So that’s not all that bad. I waited for Sam to tell me when she was ready to shoot. She text me right at ten like she said she would. “does 2-o-clock work for you?” poop. I had thought, I mean it worked for me; I was just up wit nothing to do, and nothing to read. Great. After twiddling my thumbs for two hours I headed up to the library to take back the harry potter book and get the next one, as well as check my facebook and see about more bookings. I was hoping the shot wouldn’t take long; I wanted to attend Tyler Geohagan’s graduation from OBU, which was at 6. Plenty of time I thought. So at like 1:40 Jacklyn, a girl whom I had been trying to get a hold of to see if could ride with to the graduation, came into the library. Asked me if I was ready to go. Completely taken off guard I shut my laptop and said yeah. Then the time had hit me. Turns out Tyler’s graduation wasn’t at 6 it was at 3. And I had booked up to that point with Sam, poop. So I missed Tyler’s Graduation, lame. I headed over to Sam’s smacking myself for being so forgetful. Tyler had told me Three I just simply forgot. I arrived at Sam’s right at 2. When I met her son, I was a little disappointed, I thought he would be younger, he is about to turn 2 if I’m not mistaken, I thought he was more like 5 months from the way I had heard him described. Either way I was still going to do the same shot. Jackson, the baby, had a different plan though. Sam and I tried to calm him down and get him to sit still, but it was no use. We took him outside to maybe at least get some of him smiling or something, but with the spotty clouds and him running away from me I just have a lot of out of focus and awkward shots, sorry Sam. But I still had Sam to take pictures of. So I went to an alley with a couple spots. And got this shot. After editing I brought out the eyes a bit more, used the spot healing brush to smooth the skin out, also cropped it vertical to add a visual thinness to her. Finally I added some tonal evenness with the colors.

Next I got this, same location and a bit more aggressive of a pose. Again not much editing to these, all one layer no fancy tricks, just bringing out the eyes, and spot brushing it. I did crop it so that her face was the center point not the body.

This final shot was a bit more. I debated with myself for a long time as to whether or not keep the blade of grass that is shown on the left. I thought it added some visual line that kept the viewer aware of the curve of her body, which normally I would take out, but with Sam it seemed to have worked this time. So I kept it. Then the magic of tones, and spot healing brush, had to remove some hair that was caught in the wind across her face but you can’t even tell. Thank you clone stamp tool.

And finally i’d like to introduce my new logo. If you look back at the photo’s they now have them in the bottom corner. Used two pretty good fonts one more well known than they other. Gil sans is used in the word “photography” a nice san serif . and Walbaum for the KB part. They worked exceedingly well together as far as I’m concerned. And that’s a wrap.

Word Count: 691

Day 13

Let me tell you about today May 12, 2011.

Today is better, maybe I’ve gotten used to the grey skies that have settled over the small town of Allen. Today I was grateful for them, when I awoke today I received a message from a friend. She needed help constructing a fence to keep chickens in. so I did just that, threw on my old jean a tee and a ball cap. Eyes half open I was ready to work. A little over an hour later me and a friend had built a pretty good fence, no chicken was getting out of there.. unless it flew out. After that I was treated to lunch at Dave’s the local diner. After that I headed back to my grandmothers to shower and actually get my day on the road. Hopped onto the Internet and got caught up with everything and everyone. While on the Internet I kinda did some work. I booked a double shoot for Friday, a shoot for Sunday, a shoot for Monday, and a shoot for Wednesday. Yeah I’ma beast. So I was really exicited. Maybe to excited I went and got a set of lights. We’ll see if that was a good idea come tomorrow and we’ll see if they are worth the small amount I had to spend on them. But now onto the rest of my day! I arrived back at my grandma at about three. Did some texting and t.v. watching. My grandma also treated me to Dave’s diner for dinner. I didn’t want to mention to her that I had already been there, she seemed very happy to take me. We were meeting some other members of my family that live in town, my uncle Harold, my uncle john, my aunt butchie, my grandmother and myself all went to eat. It was nice, heard all kinds of stories from when they were younger. The waitress was the same one I had earlier that day, however due to the change of clothes and a shower I don’t think she recognized me at all. We spoke some of my uncle jerry, who has cancer. He hasn’t been having the best week. He fell last night, busted his face up pretty bad, and he’s constantly on oxygen, breathing with incredible difficultly. Moving simply isn’t an option for him right now. He’s got a doctors appointment tomorrow. I hope they have good news because his kemo didn’t go so great the first time. After that we returned back to my grandmas, I just read. Read my thoughts away. And it worked, until I reached the last page that is. Goblet of fire, you are finished!

Word Count: 447

Day 12

Let me tell you about today May 11, 2011.

Today was mixed feelings kinda day, I was down. I don’t really know why but I have a good idea as to why. The weather was all a mess, which usually gets me down. But also it was a down time in my harry potter book. I’m currently reading the goblet of fire and it’s a great book; however, there is a time when harry feels alone. Every one thought he had placed his name in the goblet of fire and people were making fun of him wearing potter stinks badges. I know right, how original a teenage boy relates to a character that he is reading about. But it’s true. I do feel down and I did relate to how harry was feeling. Allen is such a strange place. In the morning you can hear the ruffling and coughing as the elderly people of the town wake up, watch the sun rise and read the paper. About an hour later you read the ready feet and engines of the school coming about. Then nothing. No sounds really come from the town until lunch when everyone heads to their respective places for lunch, some meet at the local diner, it seats about 40 and is full on any given day with the towns work force which consists of laborers who have grown up in the area and know the ins and outs of every person in the town, you hear waves of hellos as each person calls the next by first name. After lunch there is a small time of peace. At 3:00 doors burst open and kids fill the streets. Allen has virtually no crime and no traffic to speak of; most students walk to Main Street home or ride bikes with friends. It’s nice to see that kind of freedom among kids. Then at four the sounds of laughter and feet quiet as kids go inside for the night. More engines roar at 6 when most of the town can be found at the food center, a place to get tonight’s dinner, whether a family is making tacos or microwavable pizza’s you can get your supplies there. At eight-o-clock death falls over the town, not a single car on the road and no one in sight. There is a still that can only be found at a cemetery. Yet it’s only 8. The mundane practices of Allen get old quick; this exact same schedule of events happens everyday 6 to 8. Never skipping a beat. On this grey day I can’t do anything other than think, What are my friends doing? I hope they are having fun.

Word Count: 448

Day 11

Let me tell you about today May 10, 2011.

Today I had a bit of a thought. I wondered about certain things, and more than others I wondered what it would be like to live forever. What if my body didn’t break down? What if age was just a number? My head swirled with ways that this could happen. I thought of ways others had gone about trying to accomplish the same thing. Here is a break down of the ways I have come across thus far.

Holy Grail: an old story about a cup that empowered the owner eternal life when ever their lips touched the brim, sure sounds good; however, hasn’t been seen in 400 years and with a lack of a passport I don’t have time to head over to England and search for it. Next.

The Tuck Family: there is a book about a family that found a spring where the person who drank from it would be endowed with life forever staying young, not feeling pain, or the aches of disease. Not a bad pay off and the rumor of its placement is in the north eastern side of the united states, but it was rumored to be there around the 1900’s, back when trees were actually there. I doubt the spring is still there. Next.

Vampires: though I fit the role according to comments on all my pictures. I don’t know if I could do it, I don’t like the idea of staying out of the sun, I love the sun, and love fruit. Both are things vampires aren’t to keen on. That and I can’t seem to find one. They are sneaky. Next.

The Dark Lord: for a split second let’s pretend harry potter’s realm is real. Given all the dark acts I would have to comment I’m not sure I would even enjoy the life I would live. Everyone would hate me. That and I’m 19, still no letter from Hogwarts, I blame the wind from Oklahoma, no owl is flying through it. Next.

Then there is the practical way, with the advances in medical science. Lets pose a problem. I am sick. I am in need of a new kidney, with chances of finding a donor low. The doctors can only wait for so long as my kidneys are refusing to function for much longer. I pose a solution. Put me under. Take my kidneys out. But instead of trying a new set of kidneys where there are chances of tissue rejection and failure of function. Lets use modern science to solve the solution. There have been scientists working on a fluid that function much like our own blood. However it’s very complex there can’t be anything larger than 1/800 of an inch in the fluid as it would clog and collapse the arteries. Not to mention the levels of oxygen that need to be constant as they flow through the fluid. I know it’s several years away, but we are making advances in stem cell research that is going to inch this along the finish line. Once this fluid is developed one simply places the kidney extracted from the patient into the fluid and work openly on the kidney without worry of damaging the patient from such a long time under surgery. I know what you are thinking, not possible… but!
Alexis Carrol, the first American to win the Nobel prize in medicine, took a premature chicken egg and kept the it alive for 18 years in a state of frozen animation, not showing the breaking down of tissue, or aging that one would normally see. Let’s just say I’ve been thinking about this, will return to this topic later.

Word Count: 620

Day ten

Let me tell you about today May 09, 2011.

Today I want to share a rather odd fact about myself. I dream the same dream a lot. At first it was a nightmare, but over time it’s become less of a nightmare and more of a nightly occurrence. I would say I have this dream a lot, 60% of the times that I dream. Last night I dreamt this one.

I realize I’m in a room, the closest thing I have to a mental image is the shrieking shack. It’s an abandoned narrow and warped house. very small, very tiny. I am walking through the house I see the windows all broken, the dark shapes of broken furniture and broken walls. I can see my breath and feel the cold of the room as I try to realize where I am. I make my way to one of the back rooms. I open the door and see a pale blue snow globe resting on the table. I walk over to it and take a closer look at it. The objects inside the globe are not foreign and they are not still. It was like looking into a crystal ball. I could see my friends, family, and loved ones. What they were doing, how they were feeling all in a swirl of snowy flakes. I pick up the globe to examine it further. It has such a fine and delicate detail to it. The gold leaf on the side was slightly worn with age and the glass was heavy in my heads. I heard a door shut with force, startled I dropped the globe. Glass and water spread from the edge of the table to under a desk across the room. I now found myself gripping the ceiling fifteen feet in the air. My fingers dug deep into the drywall almost as if my hands themselves were talons. I can hear the faint sound of footsteps drawing nearer. I slow my breathing, in and out. The quiet of the room was only disturbed by the pounding of feet as the door swung open. A small fragile looking figure moved towards the shattered globe. As it bent down I could hear the sound of weeping as it could see the lifeless bodies of my friends and loved ones scattered across the floor.
“I’m sorry.” I managed to say in a raspy choked up voice.
The figure looked up and I could see that it was someone I knew. This time it was Kristi, there was a look of horror on her face she screamed loudly at the sight of me. Then as if I was looking at myself for the first time I could see the monster that I was. My skin was pale and my face gaunt and thin. My eyes were a brilliant blue that matched the pale grey of the globe that lay in pieces on the ground. I was bare chested and thin, each of my ribs were clearly visible. My hands were tense and sharp as I held myself against the ceiling. Muscles tight I could see my jaw extending slightly, then my mouth opened and revealed a set of bleach white fangs. My face was not in the form of sorrow as I had felt in my heart; but in rage. I watched myself drop down from the ceiling with grace. My body angled its way towards Kristi. The fear in her eyes grew as she turned and sprinted to the door; However, I was too fast I caught her with a slash to the back. Her blood was slowly soaking through her shirt. I screamed at myself to stop, but no words became audible. I finish the dream watching myself tear and peel the skin back from Kristi body, eating till I am full and content. My voice quivers as I ask myself “What are you?”
The Monster looking back at me, says in a calm voice “I am you.”

I wake up from here, sweaty, regardless how hot it is. I take a couple seconds and catch my breath. The dream is for the most part the same; however, the only things that do change are the people. The people who I see in the globe change sometimes it’s close family, sometimes it’s people I’ve just met, but it always people who am I fond of. The other thing that changes is the person who I attack. It been past girl friends, roommates, best friends, family, almost everybody I feel like. Every time I dream this dream I watch everyone I care about die at my hands. Even myself, no one else is to blame but myself. I am the monster in this dream.

I’ve tried to find out when these started, but I can’t remember the first time I had it, I don’t know what influenced it either, I have tried finding similar plots in movies, books, nothing, I don’t know why I have these reoccurring dreams or what they mean. But if I could stay awake forever, as to never have that dream again, I would.

Word count: 854

Day nine

Let me tell you about today May 08, 2011.

It’s rare when a song sums up your day, but I thought this one did a surprisingly good job. Today I didn’t feel like doing anything. I went to church and then followed up with a harry potter read a thon. Almost finished the book.

Word count: 54

Day eight

Let me tell you about today May 07, 2011.

Another early morning today, Yesterday Paula mentioned something about helping a lady from church out. I was more then glad to help. Little did I know that it meant more heavy lifting and moving, and to top it all off, I had to wake up at 8:30, I’m so tired of that time of day right now. Not to complain I love helping people out. I just wish I could help them out at 10 instead. We moved her house into a little uhaul trailer got some fresh home made cookies out of the deal, so you know I’m a happy camper. Then after that I had to shower and change. What for? KOLACHE FESTIVAL. In the small town of Prague, Heather and I have this friend Alexis. See, here she is.

Anyways their town celebrates their cech history by having this little fair style get together. They have people dress up in all sorts of outfits, polka dance, buy crafts, and ride carnival rides. We pull into this small town, guided via phone as to where to turn and park. Then we rode this trolley. (Kudos to Jacob white for that lyric.)

The trolley driver

Heather and I

We get there and it is hot. I mean HOT! So we chill out till about 6 when they have the crowning ceremony. Then we watch as the years previous “Queen” says her goodbye speech. Followed by the crowning of this years new Kolache Queen. To get an idea of what I’m talking about, these girls are dressed to a T. Some are rumored to have spent over 2,000 dollars on their dresses, let alone the time spent in polka dance lessons so they can learn the Polka.

After the ceremony they have a lot of left over Kolaches so they have a Kolache eating contest! The first to eat a whole Kolache and while wins. Not an easy task. I guess the closest thing to a kolache is a Danish, they have all kinds of fillings, like poppy seed, strawberry, pineapple, you know, everything fruit. But my new friend here, didn’t win. But she tried.

This place about to BLOW!!! Up with corn mill. After all this they clear the street and pour about 12 bags of corn mill on the street to help you scoot your feet along while you polka dance. As per tradition the first dance goes to royalty. The newly crowned royal family shares the dance with their parent. Cute. After that everyone joins in and it’s a polka festival!

Once the sunset I headed over to the carnival and got some great shots. With it being dark I was able to play with composition more and not worry about people walking, or picking their nose in the background. Most of the shots were about 1200 ISO and 1/13 of a second exposure times. Depending on the depth I wanted I played with the F-Stop and adjusted accordingly.

Oh this shot is my favorite, when I saw it I knew I had to get it! The way it lit up and the contrast between the foreground and the background, and the tones of pink and black. Yep.. it’s my fav.

Then we watched the fireworks. And headed home. Heather isn’t big on driving so I took the wheel. And by midnight I was walking in the door, yep notice I didn’t do P90X yet again, looks like Monday is another restart day.

Word Count: 585

Day seven

Let me tell you about today May 06, 2011.

Where do I begin? Today has been a great day! I woke up pretty early and went over to the Nelson’s house to ride with them to UCO in order to help Heather move out. The ride up there was normal; I took my iPod up there hoping to get some quality music time with Mumford and Sons, but no. For some odd reason my iPod audio is on the frits. I couldn’t hear the foreground audio, things like the vocals, and leads were heard. So that put a damper on trip, but I stayed positive… When we got there Heather was nowhere near packed. But I don’t blame here I mean I wouldn’t have been packed if I just finished my last final not 50 minutes before we showed up. Luckily Heather has Paula, who is a packing genius! Not two hours from then Heather’s entire room was in the back of their truck. I’m Impressed. After that Nikki had volunteered to model for me. So we took a couple shots around campus, which due to the bright sky and no cloud coverage gave me incredibly harsh shadows. We moved to the shade and got this.

I used a low f-stop, I think it was 7.3, to get a slight focus on the background. But obviously the main focus still on Nikki. Then taking it into the photo shop side I added some more contrast and tonal evenness. Used the spot healing brush where necessary. And added some more definition to the eyes.

With such a limited area of shadow to work from Nikki and I decided that it was time to head to the dance studios. We hopped in her little truck and off we went. When we got there I was a little disappointed, I for some reason thought it was be a little more… epic. I was expecting stage lights black floors, lots of mirrors, an elevated stage. None of which was even hinted at actually being there. But that’s my imagination running away with me again. Nikki posed several times for me. But I was having a hard time getting the composition to work in my favor. The walls with the ballet bar would always have a vanishing point, which made the room look funny. So those shots were… shot. Lame humor. Nikki wanted a shot of the shoes and her ring; we tried some with the shoe on her foot. But again, looked odd. I hung them up and got this.

With a low f-stop I was able to put the ring in focus and the rest of the shoe out of focus. Letting the shape become its identifier. The salmon color of the shoes came out nice. I heightened the definition of the ring to make it stand out more and adjusted its values. Then by adding a second layer and editing it I took some of the saturation out of the outside. Which allows the focus to again be brought into the center. Darkening those outside walls again adds personality and contrast. The only thing that was a little messy was the tips of Nikki’s shoes were torn. So I had to repair them and the strings hanging off them. Doesn’t look bad, I just can see some spots when zoomed in.

Then we headed back to Allen. And I didn’t have time for P90X that day. Whoops!

Word count: 575

Day six

Let me tell you about today May 05, 2011.

Today has been one of those days. When I woke up I was to tense to do P90X I wasn’t able to stretch enough in the morning, I thought I might hurt something if I tried to do it. So I am still waiting till a couple hours before I go to bed before I do it. Today I woke up and got ready; then for breakfast I had Pizza, for lunch pizza, dinner pizza, and then for desert ice cream. Screw you Mr.Tony your diet sucks anyways! Took some more picture today even though I wasn’t able to go shoot with Trista, she had some trouble getting out here.

So here is a shot of a building that is currently being torn down here in Allen. The shot turned out pretty good. I had some troubles with getting the background to not be as bright. So I decreased the saturation and messed with the levels, burned the edges old school style got some great definition, which allowed me to bring the view point to the center of the chaos. Worked out pretty good.

It’s hard out here in Allen, I mean in the city I had Internet, I had cell phone service I had lots of friends. To come at the drop of a hat to this is difficult. But with the help of my artwork, a couple books, and music I’ve been able to make it through each day without going to crazy. If you’re reading this chances are I’m sitting in my back bedroom staring at the ceiling. The ceiling that I have pretty much memorized. I’ll leave you before I start sounding depressed and lonely. Tomorrow should be a better day I’ll get to go pick up heather from school with her parents. But you’ll find out more about that in tomorrow’s issue.

Word count: 319

Day five

Let me tell you about today May 04, 2011.

This morning I felt was it was like to have my abs ripped out. No it wasn’t that bad but I could definitely feel my muscles rebelling for my actions the day before. I awoke, got some breakfast and popped in day two of my P90X series. Plyometrics. Catch earlier that I said I had breakfast not ten minutes before I popped in the DVD. Mr. Tony says his little hellos and how you do’s but he drops the mother of all phrases seconds before I he said, “here we go!” He said, “Hope you didn’t eat, and remember you do not want to eat at least an hour before doing the Plyometrics work out.” Piss my life away! I couldn’t stop I mean once I get in the mood I have to finish, if I don’t, I won’t finish. Little did know that plyometrics would be so challenging. I thought it would be light and fun, WRONG! I’m sorer today than I was yesterday. But it’s whatever I mean I can already feel my skin getting tighter which means something on me is growing. After getting the crap kicked out of me by P90X I took a shower and got ready for Internet time at the library. Sad I know. Later this afternoon I helped my uncle write to his kids. Well they aren’t really his kids; they are the kids he sponsors from the Philippines and Mexico. He has a shake in his hand from years of substance abuse but he’s straight now and has a heart of gold. So I wrote for him while he vocally told me what he wished his hands would do. He really loves those kids and I could see how much he thought about simply giving them everything he has, but can’t. Sad. After doing that I planned on reading some more potter, but couldn’t wasn’t really in the mood. So I just listened to music all day. My uncle had talked about going to Wednesday night service with me, even though I still go to the youth, little did I know that the adults don’t meet on Wednesday, who would have thought. So he just awkwardly sat there while Jeff practiced with the choir. But he’s excited for Sunday now instead. Worst awarded nephew goes to me. While I was at church I was once again reminded of my youth pastor departure from our congregation. Two more Wednesdays that’s all I get. But the good news is that Tyler is going to be in OKC for his masters in Social Services. So hopefully we will be able to get some tickets to a thunder game next season and hang out more often, I was just really looking forward spending the summer with him. Should have known better he is getting married at the end of the month. Guess this is the downfall, where all my friends start to get married, and I forever single just get to pretend to be overjoyed with them. But that is a horse for a cloudy day when the weather permits. There is this awesome site I want to shoot at tomorrow. I’ll have to get out there early because it’s a demo site. I’ll show pictures tomorrow, it will be fun. Till then tah tah.

Word count: 559

Day four

Let me tell you about today May 03, 2011.

Today I awoke with one thing in mind, P90X! Although soon after starting it I lost all that enthusiasm. According to the diet of P90X I started my day off with some good old fashion oatmeal, I don’t recall the last time I had oatmeal but I didn’t think it would be bad; however, this oatmeal was awful. I know why it was so bad too, I didn’t put any sugar in it, and I am not allowed to, so it’s going to be a long 90 days full of sugar less foods, not the best. So around 9:30 I finished my oatmeal and then had to brush my teeth to get rid of the taste. I popped in Mr.Tony and got started on day one of my P90X challenge. It was bad. There were parts that I couldn’t do. There were also parts where I fell, collapsed, and just plain couldn’t lift my body off the ground. So I’m a whimp. But it’s okay it is only day one. Followed by the back and shoulders exercise Tony requests that I do the ab ripper. Which is a whole new level of hell. Satan lives there, with a whip smacking those who choose to enter the realm of P90X. so after having my soul and energy jacked from my inner being, I looked at the clock and saw that it was only 10:30.. not even chapel time. I crawled to the bathroom and showered. After getting all clean and good looking I went to dry my hair and noticed something… a pain in my shoulders. I guess this is what It is like to be sore. I felt pain. Ugh, the pain. I fought through it and went to the library, my only source of Internet. Gave everyone a little hello and got the pictures from Alison fro the lambda shirts. Pumped those out pretty quick. Walked back because it was a nice day and grabbed my camera, I want you guys to see this place.

Here is our downtown; the center of city commerce. From here you can see the town’s grocery store on the right, and the library from where I submit these very writing, on the left you can see the town barber, and the bank, which is currently under going reconstruction.

Next you will see the water tower, our one and only landmark. It has the town’s name and mascot printed on it. Our town’s mascot is the mustang. But we use the same logo as the Broncos no infringement is intended I assure you.

Next you will see a snap shot from the town cemetery, the one place in Allen that is constantly growing. While I was there I visited several friends, and relatives who have come and gone with the years. It was nice to visit them.

And there you have it, my little town. More pictures will arise as I take them. But I’ve given you the tour of the town, nothing more really in the town. After taking the pictures I headed back home. my grandma was off work, and Preston was here cleaning the place. They have such a funny relationship; you can definitely tell that they are brother and sister. They bicker in the perfect way to where you can’t help but laugh. Tonight we have the quaint blessing of watching T.V. laughing and living in the smallest town ever.

Word count: 579

Day three

Let me tell you about today May 02, 2011.

I am Lazy, I woke up around 12 for no reason, I wasn’t tired still, I wasn’t sore from running a marathon like all my friends were. I was simply set on sleeping in. it’s such a rare event for me, I mean the only time I have to sleep in is over breaks, I enjoy it. After waking up I checked my phone and there was the news for today. Bin Laden is dead. All my texts were people telling me the news and how happy they were. Even then I didn’t feel right. I got out of bed and got ready for the day; today I went to the library to get Internet, such a blessing. I have missed it so. Don’t get me wrong I can live without facebook and everything. I just miss my friends. While I was there CNN was on the little T.V. in the corner. As you can guess the news was about the death of Bin Laden. Again I tuned it out and got back to the friends that I have missed. There are few places to go in Allen; we have a grocery store, the library, a gas station, church, and a card shop. Back in high school I was quite the dueling champ when it came to card games, yea I was a bit of a nerd. So I headed over to the tiny house of cards and thought I would poke my head in. I’ve never been into the hardcore stuff though like D&D and L5r or whatever it is. I listen to them talk about their fantasy lives and how each of them would play if they were only a couple levels higher. I felt out of place and odd. So I left. I arrived back here, in the very room I am sitting in now. I sat and thought. Thought some more then my grand mother arrived home. She’s the coolest. She watched wheel of fortune a show where she is the boss at! The puzzle only had three letters and she guessed it right. She’s the smartest! She made awesome dinner tonight as well. I’m glad she’s here. I don’t feel as alone. Then finally the news came on we watched it silently. She was working on a logic puzzle and wasn’t paying to much attention about the news of bin laden’s death. I just don’t see the joy in his death, I know he’s an awful person but I don’t justice in shooting him down. As a Christian I know he’s probably in hell. And I don’t feel like celebrating that. I mourn over it. Everywhere I have looked today the people of this world have been over turned with joy. When all there is to celebrate is death. Where have we gone, why don’t we celebrate the rising of the sun, the lowering of crime, the simple joys of waking up. Instead we stand pitchforks ready at the gallows of a man. Today we took the life of a man. I’m not ready to celebrate, I don’t know if I will ever be ready to. I know it’s un-American, but I don’t care. Justice is at the root of all our souls we should seek it out in the darkest times. Not be over ran with the thoughts of vengeance and revenge. I don’t want a death to define this time in American history, I don’t want to look back at some of the happiest times in my life and be reminded of what our nation did during those times. Why couldn’t we have chosen the high road, could we not have captured him, gave him a fair trial. I’m just confused. All I know is that man is not God, I don’t feel that we have the right or the choice to take another persons life, regardless of how unspeakable the deed is.

SHOUT OUT TO COURTNEY T!!!!

Today I went over
Word count: 659

Day two

Let me tell you about today May 01, 2011.

This morning I was awoken by the rain. I love the rain. I stayed up and listened to it for a while, and then I laid my head back down to sleep again. At 9 I got up for church. It was still raining and I was able to take deep breaths and feel relax. I appreciated the feeling after the stress of yesterday. I got in my blue truck and drove to church. I love my church family here in Allen; it’s my escape. My youth pastor Tyler is probably one of the most influential people I know. I look up to him. This morning he talked to me about quantum physics. Something he doesn’t know a lot about, but it’s fun to hear him talk about it. Today seemed off, I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I could tell Tyler was in a funk. Jenna, Tyler’s soon to be wife, showed up a little later. She too, was in a funk. Once the youth group showed up and tyler started the music I put my feelings aside and made the best of things. Tyler went to go start the lesson and give announcements, when he paused, and told us the news. Jenna and Tyler are graduating, Jenna is starting Med school, and I believe Tyler is starting grad school as well, on top of all that Tyler and Jenna are getting married before the month ends. Tyler announced that he is stepping down from as the youth minister at Allen FBC. I don’t blame him. He has a wonderful life ahead of him, not that Allen is holding him back, it’s just there is opportunity for someone else’s life to be blessed by our tiny town. I do fear for the youth group though, it’s very difficult to make the transition to a new youth pastor. I worry and pray for them all. Tyler is the reason my faith is what it is, I know the blessing he has in others lives is just as strong. I hope the students here at FBC can get used to the new youth pastor, so many times I’ve seen students walk away after losing their friend/youth pastor. Sorry, this is just tough for me. After church I just had to get out of there. I don’t know why it hit me so hard, I knew it was coming; Tyler and I had spoken several times about the doors God has been opening in his life. It’s because I feel alone. I’m alone in Allen. Tyler is really the only friend I have here until heather gets here. And now it’s like a ticking time bomb. Every second is just another second closer to him leaving. I miss everyone. I miss Suzanna, Steven, Kristi, Caleb, Danny, Haddon, Tyler, Robbie, Wendy, Ben, KJ, basically everyone. It wasn’t this bad last year. I had my parents at least. At the end of the day I know I’m not alone. But if that’s true, why do I feel this way. This is all just rambling though. I bet it’s just the weather that’s got me bummed. Will talk tomorrow.

Word Count: 534

Day one

Tonight is my first night of summer. Right now I am in my room that I will be staying for most of the summer. It has a picture of two owls, a matching dinning room style salt and pepper shaker, a fan that doesn’t work, and enough non perishable food items to keep the zombies at bay for the rest of the year, this is my room.

There has just been so much going on these past few months. I want to go over them all but if I do that I will miss out on what is happening right now with my life. What’s going on with my life right now you may ask? THE BLOGGERS CHALLENGE!!! My goal for the summer is to write a new blog everyday. I know soo original, but here’s my catch. I will have each post being in 600 words or less. Which leads me to introduce you to my new blog. In 600 Words or less. . .

Let me tell you about today.  April 30, 2011

Today was my last day on the campus of Oklahoma Christian University, I woke up early because if not they would have came and woken me up anyways. I showered, packed, and checked out, not before I found some awesome leftovers from my roommate. I am now the proud owner of a pair of Calvin Kline tighty whities. Thank Todd. Thanks. After the awkward explanation of why there was glitter all over my floor I checked out and headed over to kristi’s. Kristi has this ability to deny the extent of everything, she insisted that she was almost done packing; however I think she was like 60%, but that’s beside the point. I helped out where I could, hugged her when her roommate left, and gave my opinion when asked for it. Rounding up the troops we had Kristi, Haddon, Suzanna, Caleb, Jacob, and myself. We made our way to Chic-Fil-A, for the last time I feel like. Reason being is because Caleb split his drink everywhere!! I mean he made it rain coke. It’s his spiritual gift. From there I had to say my goodbyes. It was tough I really love my friends I don’t know how I’m going to make it this summer without them. The drive here sucked, like usual, nothing interesting ever happens, all I get to do is think, which is the worst for me. Upon arriving in Allen I noticed two things, one that I lost all cell phone service, figures. And second that the town has recently constructed a 30ft cross at its entrance. Classy. To my surprise my grandma wasn’t here. My aunt kidnapped her and they drove as a surprise to my cousin Becky’s graduation. So I unpacked my things, set up my surround sound, for music, and hung some pictures, tried to loose the grandma feel of my room. I failed. After unpacking I went over to my uncle Jerry’s. he has cancer. He’s on oxygen right now, and odd as it sounds I have this great idea for a photo shoot, maybe. Will come back to that idea. We chatted about times past in his life and stuff. Then I headed back over here with part of a cake, dinner. Popped in my favorite movie, turned up that bass and hung out with me and myself. Until! I heard a light tap at the door. I got up slowly walked the long walk from the back of the house to the front. Opened the door, it was a pair of strangers. “is Preston here?” (Preston is my uncle) “No, no he’s not here.” I said in response to their question “Oh, well we will come back.” Not really the response I wanted to hear. A couple days ago we watched the strangers for the first time, so I was wayyy freaked out. After I collected myself I cam back here again, did some design stuff getting my portfolio together and stuff.  The closet I am using has a box at the bottom filled to the brim with pictures… can you imagine what I did? I just got done spending the past 4 hours looking at pictures. Such a cool thing, that was my day, and I have church in the morning so I should call it a night. Now I just have to get over the picture of these creepy owls staring me down so I can get some shuteye.

Word Count: 580

Yearn

Ecclesiates 2:11 says: "Then I looked on all the works that my hands had done and on the labor which I had toiled; and indeed that was vanity and grasping for the wind. there was no profit under the sun. 

What have I done with my life. Is anything worth value. Was it all a chasing after the wind. Meaningless? Looking back over the past couple of years I remember my friends, family, and schooling. Where is God in all of this? I remember the happiest times in my life, not the most fun, rather the happiest.

I'm reflecting back on that time, what has changed why am I empty on the inside. I was the happiest the months leading up to my graduation. when work was easy, like breathing. my family was near and dear to me, proud of me, and a cohesive unit. A time when I had God holding me up. Everything fit.. my friends still enjoyed hanging out, and school was a social melting pot. 

I compare that to now where I spend most of my day with the same group of people. Don't get me wrong I love my friends, but every time I walk by someone I've never met, and I throwing away the opportunity to make an amazing life long friend, wife, or better yet giving them their first real friend?

 I've said before that I haven't been to church this year, or last year really. I've lost God. I can't find him, that's what I would say, but honestly I haven't been looking. I thought I could handle my own life. this past summer God called me to help others in a foreign land. At first I was pumped about it, but over time I hated the very idea of it. I hated that I would give up my life, the life that I worked hard for some Third world country that would be back in the hole two months after billions of dollars gets pumped into their economy. I couldn't believe that God would want me to throw my life away. Since then I've been living without God. Stupid I know. My youth pastor (an amazing man, I wish you all could meet him) had me over for new years 2011, I feel like he could tell, I felt dirty the whole time I was at his house. when I got back to school I shook off the feeling. got back in the groove and tried to forget about it. then I get this message from my youth pastor.  "I love you bro and only want the best for you! You have such potential to make a difference for the Kingdom and I don't want to see you not reach the your highest potential. I hope that you are staying in the word and looking for a Christian community to be involved with. You are meant for greatness! You are more than an average college student, you have Christ living inside of you! Claim it, own it, live it! Love you bro...drop me a line!" I was not going to let this message shake me up, I mean after all he didn't even know what I've been going through. I can't even explain the weight that his message laid on my heart. I read it over and over again. Thank you Tyler.. I owe you everything and more. 

I said that I wondered what was missing now 'why is college not the happiest time of my life'. I now know that God is the reason, I can't be full, I can't enjoy life unless God is the reason I make my choices. God has to be my inspiration. 

I know it's cliche to use lyrics to describe your feelings, but I don't care. I feel as if these are my feelings.

Lord I want to yearn for You

I want to burn with passion

over You and only You

Lord I want to yearn

I want a passion for the Word and for God. 

I ask that if you are reading this, that you take a second and pray for me, pray that I let God take my life for his own. Please pray that I learn more from God daily, and depend on him. 

Today I still struggle with control. I'm not fully dependent on Christ. I want that to change. I'm going to depend on God to help give me the opportunity for that to change. 

Shakespeare: To Care or Say "Forget You I Have Better Friends."

Today my friend Suzanna tripped on a fry, and fell down.
Today my friend Nate burped in a girls face.
Yesterday my friend Steven wanted to train fish to fight.

These are my friends, and this is my life.

Lately I've been wondering "Why care what others think?" Mostly I've been wondering this because I don't know when to not care and when to care, thus I am stressed about everything all the time. I AM SICK OF IT. Looking at my life there are 3 cases that are up for debate on when to care, and when not to.

1) Thoughts of a stranger: Does the opinion of a random stranger matter? Yes and No.
I've come to this thought after placing myself in several situations. the first situation is a stranger I will never meet again. I met this person while on vacation, out of town, or out of my normal travel zone. these are the people where it's okay to fart in front of, be rude, smell bad, and say whatever I want. these kinds of people are everywhere, who cares what they think.

 The second type of stranger is the local kind. this is the kind of person one would see at a local market, movies, doctors office, and school events. for some reason I insist on being overly kind to them and curse behind their back, I am okay with that, because I will only see these people maybe once or twice again in my life if I never move towns and insist on going to the same super market. To me these people thoughts are temporary and chance are even if I do meet them again they wouldn't even remember me. so who cares what this person thinks.

The third kind of stranger is the king of stranger that I would meet at church, in a class, or at work. sure you don't know them but you see them every week. these are the people I keep a very strict no talking policy with. Never will i say more than a single sentence to these people yet it's very important to not trip or mispronounce a word in front of them. on a realistic level these people thoughts matter very very small, just because I never know when I might be stuck with an assignment with them.

If you're not a stranger than I value your opinion.